Limericks for Jeff Hohman

written by others

AN ASSORTMENT OF LIMERICKS WRITTEN BY OTHERS UPON THE DEPARTURE OF JEFF HOHMAN

In the hallways of seven-five-o-five

There strode a man dressed so ‘live

In braces and saddles

(Not whips, chains and paddles)

It’s funny he hadn’t more wives.

Mike Henjy

To a man, we’re sorry you’re leaving

Though our poetry may be deceiving

We’re glad to have known you

To have heckled and groaned you

Our resumes you may soon be seeing

Unattributed

Jeff Hohman thinks he’s a punster

His humor is like Herman Munster

Now I’ve heard his rhymes

Not one’s worth a dime

You can put him and the rhymes in the dumpster

Lee Borgen

There once was a man, quite a yeoman

From that distinguished group, “House of Hohman.”

Who with great hype and ceaseless babble

Made promotionally aware our 775 piece rabble

Until he voiced, “Its time to go, man.”

Tim Higgins

Jeff is continually choking

On his words concerning his smoking

Jeff make up you mind

And get off your behind

Or one day young man, you’ll be croaking.

Unattributed

There was a young woman named Gracie

Who fell in love with a fellow quite racy

One weekend they went

Off to make it permanent

And now he’s not racy, he cracy.

Unattributed

There was a young man who went to Breck

While developing OTB was a wreck

He was never around

No where to be found

Now thanks to Jeff we’re all a wreck.

Julie Arthur

A young fellow with rueful veracity

Said he hadn’t much alcoholic capacity

So at lunch he would down

All the Heinecken in town

And that’s what I call perspicacity.

Unattributed

There was a young man we call Hoh-ses

Dressed in madras to the tips of his toeses

He thinks plaids just divine

But we wince and think I’m

Oh so glad that his fetish’s not roses.

Unattributed

There was a pub rep came from Dell

We hear he had books for to sell

But with Jeff, sad to say,

It took over a day

Bowling beat out the books, oh well.

Katie Kane

There was a young man know for punning

Definitely not for his cunning

In suspenders and bow tie

And his head held high

He left B. Dalton running.

Shelley Hurley

There was a young man from B. Dalton

Who’dress was really revolton

Somebody please tell that guy

That he’s hurtin’ my eyes

Saddle shoes and suspenders – how joltin’.

Unattributed

Month upon month Jeff attempts

Of the storefront to make some sense

This merchandise plan

Is the bane of this man

But not as much as the man to the merchants.

Unattributed

A bespectacled gent they call ho-man

When under great stress

Would say, “Oh, man –“

“That book will be late,

The ad out of date –

Those buyers they really do blow man, man.”

Jeff Capshew

Jeff Hohman thinks hockey is in

On skates he’ll go into a spin

But he’s getting quite old

At hockey less bold

Now he pushes the puck with his chin.

Lee Borgen